No this column isn鈥檛 about a new back, sack and crack method. I have been having a reoccurring dream. Every time I dream about it, I feel like I鈥檓 on the same corner of the road 鈥� but it goes nowhere.
We all have people that we have loved and are no longer with 鈥� but how many of us have returned?
I鈥檓 not thinking about going back to the family 鈥� though trust me, I have a few times. It鈥檚 about a guy – isn鈥檛 it always?
Did I make an over zealous demand to part our separate ways? Did I misjudge intent before hearing the plea? Could I have lessened my own perspective and allowed another in?
I think it鈥檚 healthy to reflect, but now this bloody issue is visiting me in my dreams.
Maybe it鈥檚 because we compare the stock that has been, is and could be on offer. If you had seventy percent of the relationship attributes right before, then could that be enough? Why aim for 90?
It鈥檚 in hindsight and with current offers on the table you can see the seventy percent probably was about eighty and it made you happy.
However 鈥� and that鈥檚 a big however 鈥� should we settle in the cul de sac of relationships because we can鈥檛 find the next road?
Rosanna thinks I don鈥檛 put myself 鈥榦ut there鈥� when it comes to meeting people when I鈥檓 out. Personally I think I do 鈥� and I find it hard work because it wasn鈥檛 ever a strong suit of mine. But I do. I鈥檓 not sure who I sound like I鈥檓 convincing. Okay, I could do more, but we don鈥檛 have time for that analysis.
I will say this 鈥� gay men are funny beasts, on one hand we say we want depth, yet we only talk to the hot guys. We bring over toothbrushes and watch DVDs after countless dinners, but we don鈥檛 want a relationship. We prefer grindr over coffee.
Hopelessly, I will continue trudging these streets, and I will find a way out of the maze.
