Comments on: Healthy sex in the Grindr city

By: John

John — Wed, 23 May 2012 21:13:42 +0000

There is not enough information about the psychology behind what is really going on, which in many cases is the development of a addicative behaviour. From my experience and observations it is de-sensitising ‘casual sex’ which is not necessarily a good thing. With apps like Grindr, it is very easy to ‘get a hit’ when your bored or need a pick me up. My question to many of my friends has been – ‘how are you going to stop when you meet someone and it becomes serious’ and of course many deny there is even an issue. In fact, Grindr is not only being used find casual sex, it is used to find ‘casual intimacy’. Upon questioning some friends I was suprised that few realised you can have sex with out intimacy and intimacy without sex.. healthy realationships – I think not.

There is alot to be said for the skills and effort needed to go to a bar an meet someone. While, I find Grindr interesting and keep watch daily, I can still count on one hand the number of guys I have met through Grindr (with fingers left over) in a 3 year period, I much prefer to meet someone in a club or social setting.

If you knew of any papers or reading on casual intimacy – would love to be pointed in the right direction….

By: Bipolar Bear

Bipolar Bear — Mon, 21 May 2012 11:18:37 +0000

I agree that we need to use technology in a positive way, but I think you're romanticising times past. Not everyone was going to bars and effortlessly using their wit and charm, some were heading down to their local toilet block where anonymous sex with a person you might not even see the face of was the norm. The internet is as human as you make it, and the spectre of 'casual sex addiction' has always been with us: http://bipolarbear.co.nz/2012/04/25/is-sex-addiction-real/

By: Gordon

Gordon — Mon, 21 May 2012 07:15:52 +0000

I deleted Grindr and Scruff from my iPhone months ago. For my own health and happiness I had to get out. My involvement with these services would have to be one of the worst gay experiences I have had in my life. It seems that many guys on these services are very comfortable hiding behind their online profiles and treating others they find unattractive with disdain and stuffing others around at will. Being on the receiving end of that treatment is soul destroying.